Moving from your hometown where you’ve spent your initial years of life in a new big city was a very difficult and a crucial decision of my life.
Settling in a new city to a new environment needs a whole lot of courage, confidence and mental preparations along with shifting your whereabouts. I always wondered how people can leave their home where they’ve created so many childhood memories with their family and friends and adopt a new lifestyle with new surroundings for the sake of work or any other objectives of their life.
Let’s talk about my reason for moving out from Bulandshahr (My Home), a small city in Uttar Pradesh, to New Delhi. Just like any other person, it was to pursue my further studies after high school. But believe me, this shift was not at all a smooth curve rather it was a giant roller coaster ride for me.
Accepting the fact that I have to start my life in a new way, around new people, scared me as much as a 4-year-old starts his playschool for the first time. Intimidated by the fact of leaving his parents outside the gate of the school and realizing that he has to face new people and a new environment without parents.
Although I had a gypsy spirit, I felt strange and anxious while trying to build a life in a new place by overcoming all the obstacles in my way with the help of my mother under the shifting process. This past move was particularly difficult for me because I was going to face the ‘real world’ on my own without my mother behind my back.
But as they say, life begins when you leave your comfort zone and moving helped me to confront my fears and how to live in this real world without any support, either emotionally or mentally. For the first time in my life, I was on my own.
I still remember my first day of college and the first step towards the new beginnings of my life. I was anxious, nervous and terrified all at the same time. The fact of interacting with new people because of my introvert personality and meeting people with very different attitude and approach towards life was making me anxious.
But somehow I managed to make friends and slowly adapted to the environment in which I was supposed to spend my next three years. People had varied personalities, some of them were very welcoming and accepting but other were full of oneself. There were so many things that I learnt during my initial days in the city and I want to share with all of you that how I managed to make myself stronger and confident to stand alone in this city and believe in the fact that I have to deal with all the roadblocks on my way to achieving my goals and a peaceful life.
Always believe in the courageousness within yourself:
We tend to forget this, I think we should always remind ourselves how strong we are to deal with any problem that comes in our way whether it is about moving in a new place and leaving behind our comfort zone, our safe place where we feel protected and secure or it is about making new decisions in life. It takes bravery to decide that you are going to uproot everything. Thus believing in ourselves is the best way to confront our thoughts and emotions. Just remember your problems can never be bigger than you.
Lose the fear of being alone
We all have entered this world alone. At every point in life there comes a moment where you’ve to do things on your own. You may be moving someplace completely new where you don’t know anyone, or you may be moving someplace where you have established connections and a great circle of friends. Regardless, don’t be afraid to explore things on your own. You should leave behind the fear of solitude and experience the new environment by yourself. Give yourself the gift of independence and establish the quality from your start. All you need is you. Whether someone says this or not “You’re an Awesome person”. Remember that.
Always be grateful for small things around you:
Appreciating little things around you and being thankful for all the amenities is the keyway of living life in any environment you’re grounded in. Make a practice of stopping and naming three things that you’re grateful for whenever you start feeling the attitude shift, even if it’s something very small. This is a very simple practice that helps create a big impact on your new living.
Stop the comparison between your previous living and the new living:
We often have that tendency of comparing our new things from the old ones. Unless we’ll not leave the past where it was, how will we be able to accept the new environment in which our present and future lie? No living situation will be the same. When you transit to a new place and a new home, you’re experiencing a completely unique adventure. Embrace all the new experiences of your life that you will grow to love, rather than focusing on what it lacks.
Get involved and set an everyday inspiration.
There are times when you feel uncomfortable, lonely and dissatisfied with your own self. In that situation, go outside and explore beautiful places, drink coffee alone, read books, interact with new people whom you find interesting, go on long walks and feel the beauty of nature and appreciate it.
The more you put yourself in places that fit your interests and lifestyle, the easier it will be to find people you resonate with. Make time every day, no matter if its five minutes or two hours, to do things that you love and that make you genuinely happy. Integrate those interests of yours into the new home that inspires you every day with a new motivation for life.
These lessons that I’ve learned, have terrified me, challenged me, and almost defeated me, but ultimately they pushed me to grow. And this growth has helped me to be a new person emotionally and mentally to achieve greater success in settlements and beyond.